Saturday, May 24, 2008

Black Heart




You let me

And now I feel

Like a scat queen

And now your halo shines bright

And now I’m shadowed by your light

And now you liar have become my sire?




You seduced me

And now I feel

Like a scat queen

And now you’re gold

And every once of my being is scarlet and cold

And every lie you tell encases you in own


Prison Cell

Is it lonely on your pedestal?

Are you and your deeds happy to see?



In fruition

Friday, May 23, 2008

Bad Day

I woke up this morning hating the world

Frowning at a smile

Punching at a hug

Kicking the day flat on its ass

Wrestling happiness into submission

Killing all who threatened my paradise lost

Thursday, May 22, 2008

An Act of Desperation (Reprise)

I’m stranded out here

My home is nowhere near

It never does rain when you ask it to

I wish I didn’t have to call you

But you’re the only one I have to turn to

My sister told me you got your self a job

My mother said you’ve got a new house

I understand you have somebody

Keeping your company

I guess your doing good for yourself

When it was all over

When the silence fell

I realized how badly my plans had failed

It never does rain when you ask it to

I thought I was better than you

But you sure showed me

Little Tony told me to say “hi” to you

There’s nothing I can say

That can change the way

I hurt you

The only truths

Where lies in whisper

It tore me apart

It never did rain when I asked it to

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

An Act of Desperation

If I could change

My point of opinion

Would we get along

Would there finally be

An end to this feud

Can there ever be a solution

Because we need a resolution

If I could tell you

Everything you want to hear

And have it he true

Would you

Could you

Get that chip off your shoulder

Can there ever be a solution

Because we need a resolution

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

A Statement Pleading for Serenity

Pulling my hair from root

Trying to find the root

Of my behaviors

Attention grabbing in their splendor

Trying to get some recognition

Of my existence

Trying to get an explanation

As to why

Trying to get a moment

Of your time

Trying to explain to myself

Why no one cares that I exist

Birthday’s come without a call

But wait…

Wasn’t it only I who helped you from your fall

Tradition decimated

Only hope left

Hope that which each passing day

Sings “Happy trails to you, goodbye my friend”

Their optimism sickens me

My trails have never been happy

My trails never will be happy

This line of life stretches into infinity

Infinite wisdom

Infinite pain

If life’s a bitch

Infinity is the Queen Bee

Whose poison I ingest

Like a sweet nectar of life

Tearing me apart

A puzzle never to be finished

Because I’m missing a piece

Of you, which I need to succeed

Giving me the motivation

To stay on track

To straighten up and fly right

The drive to get me from point “A” to the finish line

Even though I whine

Trying to peel your eyes from the screen

There is no need to do me like a two dollar hoe

On my way out the door

I want to be recognized as

The man in your life

The love your world centers around

The part of your heart that is not jaded and cold

Love me…


I’m begging you…

Love me…

Pay attention to me…


Please love me…

Monday, May 19, 2008

A Statement of Finding Oneself

At some point in life we as maturing humans decide who we want to be, the image we want to portray. At age 1 I decided I wanted to be anything but ordinary and since then it has been an up hill battle within my self to figure out what that meant to me and also how to display that on my person. Now at 17 I am finally beginning to see that person immerge. The immergence of this person is simply no more than inexplicable sudden loses of inhibitions during which I change something physical about myself. As of now I have changed my hair, got new clothes, taught myself a new way to talk and found a new way to think. This new person is fundamentally different from who I was in yester year. He is actually really cool. He is confident and secure with himself; he knows what he wants and is ambitious enough to go for it no matter what the cost. For right now I am content within this stage of my transformation, but you never know if tomorrow it that may change.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

A Statement from a Simple Man Who Doesn’t Know What He Wants

I want to kill someone so badly

I want to die

I want to cry

I want to feel

I want to go away

I want you to go away from me

I want to feel

I want to want

I want to feel the need to drop to my knees and plead for your forgiveness

I want to feel

I want you to go away from me

I want you to make me feel good

I want you to make me feel bad

I want you to make me more than this

I want more than this

I want not to want this

I want to not want you