I lay serene in the silk of rest, painting vision of perfection with my eyes closed and body still. I showed what I had created to Nocturne and dared it to find one of such a magnitude. Nocturne accepted my dare of perfection and delivered him in a brown paper parcel to my heart. Eagerly I stared at it thinking of what it would contain. Would it match of what I had described or would he like all the others fall in a burst of failed luster.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Friday, May 16, 2008
A Fly On The Wall
The fury and the fight
I smell the demon on his tounge
It lubricates the item, for which he’s bought and paid
I feel the caution in the company of the other; it’s obvious in his touch
In the alcoholic haze his reasoning has been withered
But even in inebriation he remembers what she did.
He remembers the hurt he felt
He remembers how after 12 years he found out; he fell in love with a whore.
He revels in the memory of the whore’s fist pounding at the door
He’s aggrieved as he bethinks the splashing of his tears on the cold cherry wood floor
In this moment the hurt he feels can only be mend by the touch of a stranger
Or so he thinks
As he begins to use what he’s bought, he feels his eyes begin to water
He knows this isn’t revenge, he knows this isn’t right
He pulls put
500 dollars walks out
And there he is on the floor, feeling discarded and used
Realizing sanity has slipped his grasp
Thinking of how the whore lay snug, and smug in bed.
The sweat from his pores pours cold
Erasing dreams of the two growing old
He listens to the lies the walls speak
The passion the sheets sing
The promises his heart wrote with his lips in front of 97 witnesses
It seems irrelevant as he watches the fire rise up the walls
The smoke fills his lungs and the fire loosed his soul
The whore watches as her last chance goes up in smoke
Knowing redemption has slipped from her grasp
Thursday, May 15, 2008
A4A
It occurs to me as I cruise this website and raise this tumbler to my lips that this just isn’t right. Not “right” in the since that I should have gone left, not that this answer is incorrect but rather that this just isn’t right.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
3
Nobody knows the pain they share
The nights of drunken fear
Has torn this family apart
She drinks to relieve the pain
he tries to make her laugh
she secludes to pandemonium
It’s her only place to go
If given a chance She would die
If given a chance he would too
If given a chance she would kill them
Why is their no answer to their screams of pain?
Must only their memory remains before something is done?
If they survive Her,
Like I hope they will
Let’s hope they can change the path of self destruction
That is out of Her control
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
5:00am
The subtle subconscious anticipation
It’s overwhelming
To know that I have no idea where time will take me
Encourages courage
Impressions of dreams
Cut with worry
I’m not in control
Nothing changes
Monday, May 12, 2008
Blue Thursday
I think the sky can feel our sorrows
It seems to rain down harder
Adding a flood to the waters
I don’t know what to think
I was nearly done grieving
It all is happening at once
I’m lost one hundred miles from where I want to be
The stories they tell cause my ears to bleed
I have been drained empty
Too many changes
Not nearly enough chances
I just got here and the fires are burning
She’s fighting to leave but I won’t let her go
The rain I harder this time
Now it has stopped
It never stays away for long
The world never seems to stop
Never giving my pain a chance to ebb
Sunday, May 11, 2008
A Loosing Game
Each drop of sweat seeping from my pores is loosening my grip
I am loosing control
In truth I am falling
I am falling back into the hole that I just climbed out of
I am falling back into the criminal abyss
The handle bar to which I grasp is rusted
My emotional void is fading to black
This bedroom is my asylum
I do not want to leave
I awake to sunrise begging for it to set
In truth I am ready, I am ready to let go
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